Gene was driving through the suburbs. He was in the right-hand lane and was going the posted speed limit. Impatient speedsters were lining up behind him. Some were making a risky attempt to get into the faster moving left-hand lane. A traffic light turned red, and Gene stopped along with a truck in the left lane. The passenger in the truck leaned out his window and says to Gene, “How come you were going so slow?” Gene replies, “I didn’t know that speed limit sign was just a suggestion, or I might have gone a little faster!”

Help Wanted

I may have shown you this story before. It’s one of my favorites, so I’m running it again. I think it’s funny, and I hope you do, too.

We lived in Keller, Texas, a small town on the north side of Fort Worth. My friend, Gene Maness, also retired, was going to have to work that day. He owned a rental unit in the center of Fort Worth, and he was going to re-tile the bathroom floor there. He dreaded the job because he knew his bad knee would really be hurting by the end of the day.

Gene loaded the materials in the back of his small pick-up, and headed for I-35. Not being one to enjoy freeway driving alongside all the morning commuters, he soon cut over to Main Street. Going through Old Fort Worth, he passed Billy Bob’s and the Stockyards and soon crossed the Trinity River and headed up the hill to the business district. It was a nice, warm day, and he had his windows down as he drove through town. Coming to a red light, he was the first one at the intersection, and he noticed a young woman standing on the curb as he drove up and stopped. The young woman bent down and peered in his window and smiled. “Is there anything  I can do for you?” she asked. Gene stared at here for a moment and then asked, “Can you lay tile?”

Dave Thomas

April 10, 2025